Monday, June 20, 2011

Slipping

Some days I feel like I'm loosing it. It's like we are just barley keeping our heads above water. More days than not it feels like were gonna drown. When we were trying for Lucas, David had a good steady job and we were totally on our feet. The second we got our long awaited miracle things went down hill. We were still great as a family and ecstatic that we were having a baby, but everything seemed to crumble. 
All of a sudden our insurance wouldn't pay for prenatal (even though we specifically asked them and they did when we got it). Then David found a job closer to home that totally feel though once he got here. (He was working two states away, can't even tell you how much harder that made TTC) So a bunch of ups and downs came after that. I am so thankful for the things we do have. Like two amazing healthy children, but it's just hard some days. 
We are on top of things and get all the bills paid but it just seems so hard sometimes and like we just aren't going to make it. I keep telling myself three more months and I'll graduate, just three more months. I am so hoping I get out on externs (which start next week) and I finish out and get hired by one of them, That would be amazing right?
I trust in God's plan and I know we will make it though. I am only human though and can't help but worry. Hoping things stay on a good path and only go up from here, but being realistic I am holding on tight and am ready for what gets thrown our way. 

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